It is Well with My Soul

Hebrews 2:16 - For indeed He does not give aid to angels, but He does give aid to the seed of Abraham.

The past couple weeks have been a doozy! With finals, the spring musical, work and on top of that some personal things I am not to fond of right now. I say "personal" not because it only involves myself, but because the issues are personalized. It has been a struggle to keep my spirit up and motivated at times. I was giving up and giving in until that gave the enemy more motive to take me for what seemed to be all I had left. Thank God for the other day. For blessings and for rejuvenation, for a spirit who has been strengthened to push through the muck and succeed. The above verse is testimony to what this week has been about. Oh that the Lord would take this seed of mine and lend His aid. I'm not making it through everyday on my own, and literally I don't think I would be getting out of bed if not for God. I feel the enemy crawling up to me and today I said no to the evil treatment... no one deserves to suffer like that. I was reminded that "just because we are christians when we are slapped, doesn't mean we have to turn the other cheek and ask to get slapped again." God is doing great things how dare the enemy come and try to attack the movement in my heart, mind and spirit. He has taken my sin and the sin of the enemy that weighs me down to the cross. In rehearsal we were given a few minutes of silence to pray silently and this is one thing I reflected on.

 "Is it any wonder that the weight of all this sin began squeezing the life out of Jesus on the night he was called to bear it?" Matt 26:36-44 - Prayer In The Garden

Brit Coleman was such a blessing today. She came by to borrow a cocktail dress and blessed me so much with her encouragement and verse:

Psalm 143 Psalm of David 

 1 LORD, hear my prayer,
   listen to my cry for mercy;
in your faithfulness and righteousness
   come to my relief.
2 Do not bring your servant into judgment,
   for no one living is righteous before you.
3 The enemy pursues me,
   he crushes me to the ground;
he makes me dwell in the darkness
   like those long dead.
4 So my spirit grows faint within me;
   my heart within me is dismayed.
5 I remember the days of long ago;
   I meditate on all your works
   and consider what your hands have done.
6 I spread out my hands to you;
   I thirst for you like a parched land. 7 Answer me quickly, LORD;
   my spirit fails.
Do not hide your face from me
   or I will be like those who go down to the pit.
8 Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love,
   for I have put my trust in you.
Show me the way I should go,
   for to you I entrust my life.
9 Rescue me from my enemies, LORD,
   for I hide myself in you.
10 Teach me to do your will,
   for you are my God;
may your good Spirit
   lead me on level ground.
 11 For your name’s sake, LORD, preserve my life;
   in your righteousness, bring me out of trouble.
12 In your unfailing love, silence my enemies;
   destroy all my foes,
   for I am your servant.

After reading this I cannot not be full in heart. May I carry this with me throughout this season. 


AMEN


p.s. I leave for Maryland in the morning... :D Yea Easter with Family!

Up Up & Away

Wow what a day. That's really the expression I would give to describe this day: Wow. The Lord has done so many things in one day it blows my mind!

• I went to bed with a hurt neck... so painful and throbbing headache. My roommate Katie prayed over my neck and I went to bed with the last prayer on my lips for a miracle to happen in healing. I awoke in the morning exclaiming and smiling with Joy that my neck was completely healed! I'm not even kidding I had so much joy! 
• Then the challenges arose. Got in a little tiff with a friend this morning over something stupid. It was tense... & other people didn't help the situation. I went into class needing to chill... and the matters just got worse when I got to class. I didn't pay attention to anything my teacher said. I did meet with my partner for ASM project though.
• Went to the shop to set a fitting appt. Walked in and Jude of all people hollered my name as I walked in "GAAAAAAABE!" It startled me! She said "don't be scared I was just happy to see you." It made me feel so good to hear her say that :) I started to cry. Jess asked me what was going on and I broke. CJ, Jess & Jude all sat in the office with me and listened to me cry and they were so uplifting! Oh how much of a blessing!
• I went to lunch with Jess. It was nice to sit down and be with someone I haven't been able to spend a lot of time with.
• I received txt messages from friends who saw me in passing & noticed I was sad. I even received txts from friends saying that they loved me even when they had no idea what was going on. They were encouraging and beautiful. I went to work... painted... and praised God. Beautiful Joy. Oh so ABOUNDING JOY!
• I came home to find a cookie cake on my kitchen table... the frosting said "You Are Beautiful" - It was from a girl that was in the shop when I came in a broke down. 
• I received encouragement via facebook from people who saw me in the day.
• I went to rehearsal ready to greet and defeat. NOTHING COULD BRING ME DOWN. I did find myself dragging. I was exhausted from the long day & emotional roller-coaster. I pushed I pushed through to the end of the show.
• As I walk back to the commons I get a call from Jordan. He and meg offer to buy me Taco Bell. Awesome!
• I go to meet with Christen to talk about filming. We talk & then she prayed over me. :) Blessing.
• I go to talk with Jamie about not studying... she prays with me. Beautiful.
• Meg and Jordan pick me up and we go to Megs new apt. We sit and eat Taco Bell & cookie cake. Fellowship. Beautiful.
• We prayed over each other and Meg's apt as we left. Marvelous.
• I get home. I shower. I sit here. I thank God for this day. 

I have greeted the Lord in prayer sooooooo many times today. Its marvelous. It feels so amazing to be constantly talking with, praising, and praying to the Lord. 

& in the name of my Saviour, Father, & Friend --- peace over this night and energy for tomorrow. & good grades on my exam? yes. 

Never Far Away

Today I got to speak with two very good friends "best" friends from florida. It was a joy to talk with them for the time I had. Its funny... I felt very awkward at first because I felt bad for not keeping in as close contact as I should have... but then again I hadn't heard from them either. So I was nervous about starting up a conversation. You know... it wasn't bad. I had two very nice conversations with two beautiful brides of Christ. One in particular conversation was such a blessing. She didn't know it but she confirmed something that the Lord had been trying to tell me for about a week now, she as well as my friend Jamie who also without knowing spoke upon me with the same scripture and encouragement. Dear Lord... THANK YOU. Seriously. I needed to hear what I was presented with. It has led me to set my heart straight and clear my mind.

Psalm 37:3-9 (New King James Version)

 ³ Trust in the LORD, and do good;
         Dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness.
 ⁴ Delight yourself also in the LORD,
         And He shall give you the desires of your heart.
        
 ⁵ Commit your way to the LORD,
         Trust also in Him,
         And He shall bring it to pass.
 ⁶ He shall bring forth your righteousness as the light,
         And your justice as the noonday.
        
 ⁷ Rest in the LORD, and wait patiently for Him;
         Do not fret because of him who prospers in his way,
         Because of the man who brings wicked schemes to pass.
 ⁸ Cease from anger, and forsake wrath;
         Do not fret—it only causes harm.
        
 ⁹ For evildoers shall be cut off;
         But those who wait on the LORD,
         They shall inherit the earth.

HELLO! WAKE UP! I read this what about 4 days ago and here it greets me again. I'm waiting Lord, I have been waiting, I got a little anxious there for a moment but I will be still now. I wont worry, assuredly I will have peace and hope. So heres another part of growing up. Waiting... being patient... and having peace. I found so much freedom tonight. Especially when I read a letter I wrote to myself back in August. I will post that later on. But it was almost as if I was reading a letter addressed to me written by someone else. It made me cry. God is good. All the time.

I am EXCITED... to be EXCITED... about JESUS. :)

Paper House

I have seen the Holy Spirit move more this year and this semester than any other in my life. He is the real deal. Notice that the Holy Spirit is not an "it." The scripture below specifically says "who."

Isaiah 59
21 “As for me, this is my covenant with them,” says the LORD. “My Spirit, who is on you, will not depart from you, and my words that I have put in your mouth will always be on your lips, on the lips of your children and on the lips of their descendants—from this time on and forever,” says the LORD.

I've been able to recognize the Holy Spirit in my life but never like this before. It's becoming harder and there are more challenges of the heart when it comes to my encounters with the Holy Spirit. Prophecy is a big thing I have learned a lot about this year. To practice prophesying over people; basically covering people with prayer that the Holy Spirit is leading. My life verse/favorite verse in the bible is about prayer and the Holy Spirit.

Romans 8
26 In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. 27 And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God.

My Spirit has been challenged with difficulties this year. Overcoming them has only made it stronger. No way I would have even been able to begin to overcome them if it wasn't for God. So New challenges present themselves and I go back to the word and prayer. Steps in the right direction. This is preparation for what's ahead.

I remember going on a walk with a good friend of mine before school began this year and we talked for a long while about the excitement we were feeling for the upcoming year. Both our spirits and other peoples spirits were filled with this unexplainable excitement for something BIG happening at Regent. So much has happened this year, but the year isn't over just yet. There is still more to come and more to experience. Maybe these past months have been what our Spirits were excited for or maybe it is to come. In all we will never know the vastness of wonder before us. It will be great to look back on it and smile.




RIVER JAMES - PAPER HOUSE

Knocking on my door
and you're calling out my name
But you won't come in until I let you in

Knocking on my door
you keep calling out my name
But you won't come in until I say

To my
Paper house
To my
Paper house
To my
Paper house

Standing on my lawn
with the scissors in your hands
and you could come in where you'd like

To my
Paper house
To my
Paper house
To my
Paper house

Rain's falling now
soaking right through these walls
I can see the sun it's shining

Rain's falling now
soaking right through these walls
I can see your form outside
of my

Paper house

Flying Time

It's funny how time moves forward so quickly. We are never in one place very long. We tend to forget happenings and exactly how we got where. Those things just kind of fade into the background. But at times I like to remember. The reason I think about this particular subject is because of my Brother In-Law Chris. He blogged today a picture and a few lines.

You can find it here: http://iamnuckels.blogspot.com/2011/04/two-years-ago.html

2 years ago today (April 14th 2009) My Brother In-Laws father passed. Totally unforeseen. I met his father when I was around 10 years old... maybe 11. Here I am almost 20, time has flown. I can't believe that it has been two years... I can remember those moments like it was yesterday. My sister was pregnant with my nephew. It pains me to think that he never got to see his grandson being born. Almost a month after Earl's passing My sister had Ryland. It was a time of joy and also of pain.

How quick is the second of time we are here on this earth. How meaningful it is to hold every moment with such worth. The time spent with one another and the time spent in love.

I think back on my childhood- spent in 2 different states. Kansas & Texas. Magical jungle gyms. Lassie the dog we fed chicken bones to. Tornados chasing our car. Chewy the dog next door. The twins that moved in. Field Days. Church adventures. Friends in a car wreck during DNOW 08. A teen from church dies in a car wreck at 15. A loved theatre director in our district dies. My sister has my neice. My abuela passes away.

I think back on my adolescence. Texas & Florida. Never thought I would move my Jr. year. SJCCA. My great uncle dies. So much growth at TPAC. Disney Candlelight. SLU 101 & 201. Prom Alt. 08 & 09. Lifeguard for a summer. Get a car. Chris' father dies. ReelDreams. Michaela has Ryland. Graduation.

I think back over the past almost 2 years. Virginia & West Virginia & Texas. Never thought dad would get laid off. Move to WV of all places?! Attend Regent U. Get swept away by immaturity. Struggle to stay alive. Battle every day. Get a job. Get cast in Little Women. Go back home (FL) for Disney Candlelight 09. Hit rock bottom. Snowed in. Visit MD. Stay the summer in VB and MO. Take screen acting. Healing. 48 hr. film fest chesapeake. Work for my grandfather. Receive love and wisdom from my grandmother. Conditioning of the heart and spirit. Family moves to Texas. Stage Manage. God heals. Make it over the hurdles. Get cast in 3 shows. Act in a Sex Trafficking Awareness Drama. Growing into a Woman.


Life has brought me here. The Lord has laid the road. Oh may I let the ones I love know it.

I read this yesterday as I ran from the world.
Luke 12:
35 “Be dressed ready for service and keep your lamps burning, 36 like servants waiting for their master to return from a wedding banquet, so that when he comes and knocks they can immediately open the door for him.

I was wanting to define dressed. Being dressed is so encompassing of many things. But, in relation to love. I will love and be ready to love and keep love burning till the master returns. So when he comes I can open the door knowing I have done what he has asked of me.

Then They Will Know

Oh Lord, 

restore the joy of my salvation to me,

And pour once again the love 

that has caused the blind to see, out on me

Let hallelujahs fill my lips, when I sing

Let righteous renewal flow from the words that I speak

And I will dance because you gave me life

And I will love with all I have inside

And I will share because given everything for me

And then they will know

We are forgiven

And then they will know

We are loved, God

And then they will know

Cause they have seen, they have heard,

With our hands and with our feet we have shown love

la, la, la, la,...

God, teach me to love 

in ways that set the captives free

And strength to forgive 

the way that you’ve forgiven me

Let signs and wonders fill my life, for all to see

Let glory from your temple flow into the streets!

And I will dance because you gave me life

And I will love with all I have inside

And I will share because given everything for me

And then they will know

We are forgiven

And then they will know

We are loved, God

And then they will know

Cause they have seen, they have heard,

With our hands and with our feet we have shown love

This is Living

 Struggle. This day was an all around struggle for many of us in the Com School. I had to leave campus because I needed to get away. For 2 hours I sat in a coffee shop and read my bible, journal'd, and prayed. I couldn't figure out where the hurt was coming from. It was all encompassing and consuming. There was a burden not foreseen. The Lord spoke to me in my time with Him as well as through the heavy clouds in the sky. I drove back home in my car and teared up a little. Today, was a day that many of my brothers and sisters were struggling as well. It was prayed over at rehearsal tonight. All day I have had such a heavy burden to cry. When I got home tonight all let loose and this Psalm is a result of my cries... I didn't sit there and try to come up with this... it just came. God Inspired.

This Is Living

Lord why am I weeping?

I have come to know this position well

As if I lie in my mothers womb

Everything in me erupts 

I have spilled everything on the floor

My bags I have dropped at your feet

Selah

Lord why have you created me so?

Who I am confuses even myself

Everyday something new

There are no sounds

Though my mouth is open

My body contracts and silence

Selah

Lord what is this that plagues me?

It came in the night while I was sleeping

There was no stop to it

My eyes are dry

Yet my heart it is an ocean of tears

I’m drowning in it, save me!

Selah

Lord who is hurting?

They’re cries are ringing out

The silence screams for their sake

Its everywhere

I can feel the devastation

A cry for help in a foreign land

Selah

Lord I see You coming!

As we cry out, You whisper

My Love I Came and I am Coming

Selah 

 ©Copyright Gabrielle Davison, 2011

Tension

I went to lay in bed last night very agitated. My teeth cringed and my chest tight as I took shallow breaths. Birdie rehearsal was ok. I had coffee and ate milk duds like no ones business. We learned the Overture number (backwards in musical time)
[Bieber->NSYNC->Vanilla Ice->Michael Jackson->Disco->Jimmy Hendrix->Beach Boys/Gogo->Beatles->Elvis->Conrad Birdie]
Yeah you wish you were coming to this Bye Bye Birdie. If you are, then good for you :)

Anyway 4 hours of dancing made me want to die. So I come home and relax for a bit and then found myself very frustrated. I was all the sudden filled with tension. So I posted this: http://gabrielledavison.tumblr.com/post/4572872635/sometimes-i-get-really-frustrated-i-cringe-my 

I decided that I was too tired for being ticked off and went to lay in bed and have Jesus time. God and I talked for a while and I expressed my frustration. Its so stupid. I realize that my feelings should not be so big towards this "issue" that isn't really an issue at all! I'm a female. Holy Crap! I have ridiculous out of this world feelings that sometimes... most of the times are thrown out of proportion... it doesn't help that I am a actress either.

So I laid there and prayed that God would forgive me for my anxious heart and spirit. That He would calm my mind and heart together. It's not easy. Sure I slept through the night, but this prayer is to remain at a constant right now because I find myself easily ticked off today. Especially when I got to my first class this morning. Oh ... yeah... that was fun ... ::sarcasm:: Wow... I'm really hittin all those unpleasant feelings today. But you know what...  better is He that sees my heart and being, yet still loves me.

Romans 3:5 But if our unrighteousness brings out God’s righteousness more clearly, what shall we say?

How much better the beauty of Christ when in the midst of our own fault we can see His glory. So I am seeing His glory today. I am holding out through this rough spot. Listening to what is uplifting and wholesome. Killing my own sin with kindness. 

Oh Lord, that you may transform my worst of times to be uplifting and whole. That this day may be of much worth and growth to this hungry woman's heart. Release this inner strife and bring new life.

 Amen.

Touched

This will be a short post but it is about something meaningful. At least it was a meaningful moment to me.

Tonight when rehearsal ended I was determined to leave the building first so I could find a parking spot at the commons. As I rushed out the loading dock door I saw out of the corner of my eye a woman standing with her face to the brick wall and her hand up to her mouth. The woman turns out was one of the hispanic custodians for Regent. As I rushed through the door she turned and with with a breath said "Thank you Jesus!" and rushed to grab the door handle before it closed. You see, at regent the doors lock as you exit them, in most areas you have to have key card access. This woman was standing facing the brick wall praying that someone would open the door because she had locked herself out.

Sometimes its as if even in passing moments my heart can take up a lot of information even feel what others are feeling just by having a deep understanding and compassion for people. As she turned to quickly catch the door I turned as well to try and catch it. She got back inside. :)

But for the moment after this spilt second of interaction I felt like I wanted to cry. My heart just felt for her. She was scared that she wouldn't be able to get back in the building which has its consequences. I was touched by her faith and her praise. That moment caught my heart. I want to know her. I want to be friendly.

I think also being of hispanic background I connect easily with the people on campus who are hispanic. Or those who speak little english. I try and make conversation and form a somewhat relationship with them. I feel as if they are just looked past and ignored because of their job. I love to interact with them. They remind me of my Abuelita and Abuelito :)

That's all. I was touched. Funny how my heart works, that 5 seconds could impact me for the night.

My Next Writing Venture

So there is a class on campus that is based on the study of "Psalms" :) How awesome is that!? Anyway, their latest and greatest assignment was to write their own Psalm. I had the privilege of listening to one that one of my girl friends wrote the other day. Beauty through and through. What is funny is that I already write Psalms myself. My own prayers in free verse. I would love to continue writing them. So here I am to say that my goal is to keep the prayers flowing. :)

Bride to Be

Our Relationship = Priceless

The Knot

Two friends whom I met at the beginning of last year are getting married this summer. In fact, they are getting married on my 20th Birthday, June 18 2011. It has been beautiful to see their relationship flourish. John used to be "the laundry boy". Then I came to know him as one of the 401 roommates. Corrie has been such a blessing over the past almost 2 years. She is such a strong woman of God and has a beautiful story to tell. I love watching them together, it is sort of amusing.


So today is Corrie's Bridal Shower. 5 pm in the above the Regent Fountain View Room. I cannot wait! I'm sure she is even more excited... based on the txts between myself and her this morning. I am blessed to have Miss Corrie as a sister in Christ.


Hooray! Wedding!

TheKnot <- Their Wedding Website

HOORAY WEDDING!

A Person Of Character

From "IMPACT : The Student Leadership Bible"

What is Character?

Psalm 15

1. "Works Righteousness" (vs. 2) - doing the right thing - "God's thing" - no matter the cost
2. "Walks Uprightly" (vs. 2) - deals with personal trials & mistakes with integrity - admits to them and makes corrections and restitution
3. "Speaks Truth In His Heart" (vs. 2) - delights in things that are honest and genuine - guards the honesty of his heart 
4. "Does Not Backbite With His Tongue" (vs. 3) - uses disciplined words and doesn't slander - speaks truth, brings life, strength and joy to others in their words
5. "Honors Those Who Fear The Lord" (vs. 4) - defends others who are righteous, friend or not - goes to their aid regardless of cost
6. "Swears To His Own Hurt and Does Not Change" (vs. 4) - Yes means Yes - No means No
7. "Does Not Put Out His Own Money At Usury" (vs. 5) - doesn't use money as gain to the expense of others - understanding that what they have is a gift of God and what they have needs to be used to accomplish God's purposes
8. "Does Not Take A Bribe Against The Innocent" (vs. 5) - doesn't use people to meet emotional, physical or financial needs - treats everyone as the Sons and Daughters of God

Another 4 Hours

I have just spent another 4 hours dancing. We are almost to tech week of Bye Bye Birdie. Today was especially long since I worked from 9am-5pm. Just like any other Friday, I don't sleep in like my other friends, I go to work. Today we accomplished a lot & I'm feelin it. I got to use the moving lift today... I was about 4 stories high above the stage leaning over the lift and painting the rest of the set. 


After work I rushed home to take a shower... not having time to wash my hair I kept it up in its somewhatmessyputtogether state. :) Then went to eat pizza and fellowship with the Reel Dreams Film Competition Finalists. Then it was on to rehearsal.


So 3 pieces of Pizza & 2.5 brownies later I am dancing. Can you say B-A-D    I-D-E-A!? I will. Bad. Idea.  Its interesting though. I was laying in my passed out state on the floor after a big dance number as we were transitioning scenes, and one of the girls started telling me how she was concerned because her feet are getting confused in some of the songs and its proposing a challenge that makes her sad. I immediately associated with her, because I had been feeling the same way. But, since I have been praying (that the Lord would move my feet and body, to give me the ability and help my mind to soak things up and perform to the best) I have been feeling so much more freed and able to do the dances. :) Prayer Works. So I turned over to her and prayed that same prayer over her. If there is anything I can do other than encourage her, it is to pray over her. Prayer... even more powerful than just encouragement. I believe that the Lord will give her the memory recall and tell her feet when to move. He has already helped me so much in that area. He wouldn't have us there if He didn't want us there. 


Anyway, something else not so pleasant happened tonight, but it made me see progress in myself. Interesting yeah? Well, another person in the show began to directly outwardly and frustratingly complain about the dance partner they have for a number. How they would rather be dancing with the other person standing with us. They made some very hurtful statements about that person which I won't repeat, but I standing there hearing this said directly to me and another cast member could not help but feel discouraged for that other dance partner. I responded with "They're going to learn a lot through this experience. We have 2 weeks it'll be ok." The other person standing there with me didn't quite know how to respond to what the other person was saying so I spoke up. If someone were to say that: "She takes too long to figure out the dances... or... Why doesn't she get it... or... She's slow... or ... it's so simple I don't even know why she's a dancer in this show." I would feel so hurt. I know that I am slower than most dancers but thats what makes the end such a rewarding pay-off. I have busted my BUTT to get where I am in the end. That's why I was awarded "Dancer with Most Perseverance" in HS. I would stay after class and work till I was kicked out of the dance room. I know and I am not ashamed that it takes my brain longer and my body slower to get things. But to have someone outwardly scoff about that. That is hurt. So when it came to a friend, that was saddening to me. Where I saw the progress in life was decision making. I could have commented on that persons dancing capabilities as well, I could have built the complaints up with negative words... but instead I chose to direct positive words. You know what? It felt great. I built my friend up... even though they didn't know. But I had that persons back. Kinda reminds me of a good friend whom I saw doing that all the time with his own friends. Directing negative words into positive energy. I miss him. :)



^{1 Thess. 5:11} Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.

Awake Awake Awake!

³ The LORD will surely comfort Zion and will look with compassion on all her ruins; he will make her deserts like Eden, her wastelands like the garden of the LORD. Joy and gladness will be found in her,    thanksgiving and the sound of singing.

Oh that the Lord would comfort me as He did with Zion. That no matter in all the distress or whatever muck I have trudged through he would still look upon me with compassion. That in times of the dry spell He would water my spirit and make it as Eden. That where I have made a mess of life He would make them new, that the Lord would look and find Joy and Gladness in my heart, spirit and smile. That I may dance and sing and laugh in spite of the life I live here. Oh that it would overwhelm my soul. 

Today I found myself yearning for more. I was distraught after what I thought was going to be a failed attempt at making dinner for me and my roommates (funny how such unimportant things can get the best of us). In the end I was tired and just wanted to rest in the Lord. So I went to lie down for 30 minutes and faced my window watching such beauty as I feel asleep.


I walked in on my roommate today as she was sitting on the floor leaning on her bed... I looked upon her feet and saw she was wearing jazz shoes. "You're wearing jazz shoes," I said. "Yes, I was dancing for Jesus," she replied. My heart, Oh my heart, how it just flew when she said that. I could not thank God enough for her. I love dancing for Jesus. I love dancing and my soul has always wanted to dance for the Lord... I am just learning to dance in freedom. I started dancing late last year. I would go for a walk at night, with my iPod in my ears and just start dancing to praise music. I didn't care if anyone saw me, but no one was really around. Recently, I have been dancing more in worship. Freedom my love. Freedom in spirit. That my heart, spirit, tongue and body as a whole would praise the Lord :)

⁹ Awake, awake, arm of the LORD, 
   clothe yourself with strength! 
Awake, as in days gone by, 
   as in generations of old. 

Verse 9 is such a testament to what I could not say in my own words. I wish to awake to each new day with a full heart, readiness, and strength to make it through the day. I make this my prayer. Oh Lord that my days would be meaningful and full in Your eyes & mine. That all distress and weakness would pass from this body. For I long to live my days here to the fullest. 

Some Excerpts From 2 Corinthians 10

³ For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. ⁴ The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds.

¹⁰ For some say, “His letters are weighty and forceful, but in person he is unimpressive and his speaking amounts to nothing.” ¹¹ Such people should realize that what we are in our letters when we are absent, we will be in our actions when we are present.

¹³ We, however, will not boast beyond proper limits, but will confine our boasting to the sphere of service God himself has assigned to us, a sphere that also includes you. 

 ¹⁵Neither do we go beyond our limits by boasting of work done by others. Our hope is that, as your faith continues to grow, our sphere of activity among you will greatly expand, ¹⁶ so that we can preach the gospel in the regions beyond you. For we do not want to boast about work already done in someone else’s territory. ¹⁷ But, “Let the one who boasts boast in the Lord.”^[b] 18 For it is not the one who commends himself who is approved, but the one whom the Lord commends. 

 

 

Seeing Him Face to Face

"I have much to say to you, but I do not want to use paper and ink. Instead, I hope to visit you and talk with you face to face, so that our joy may be complete." (2 John 1:12 [NIV])

I'm Hungry

As my title states I am hungry. I sit here at almost 5 in the afternoon on the couch in my living room. It's about time for me to be putting dinner together. Katie (my roommate) made a absolutely AMAZING meatloaf last night. As I was dancing in Bye Bye Birdie rehearsal I kept burping meatloaf (doesn't that sound appetizing). Anyways, I am going to be eating wonderful left-overs and a salad which is chilling on my counter right now. 

It's interesting to think about what happens when we hunger. In my case, since I am Hypoglycemic (is the medical term for a state produced by a lower than normal level of blood glucose. The term literally means "under-sweet blood" -- So I guess a vampire is out of luck when it comes to taking my blood it will be "un"sweetened), I have to constantly be eating good portions of protein. I can't just eat some candy and restore my blood sugar to a good level. Basically, my blood sugar level will spike, and I get really sick. But on the other end, if I don't eat any protein or get some sugar in my system I get really sick. So the way I stay alive is by trying to stay in the medium with balanced levels. 

When I haven't eaten I get shaky, my head begins to hurt, my stomach begins to eat itself, and I have no physical or mental energy to do anything. My whole being is desperate and dependent on the food I eat. I must eat everyday 3 times or more. Shouldn't this also be the case for my daily walk with God? Should I not long to speak with my Heavenly Father? To hear His sweet voice whispering in my ear? When I go through the whole day too busy to stop and say a prayer should I not feel drained having not been in His presence? Perhaps it doesn't hit suddenly at the end of my day but it sure catches up and when it does it is drastic. For my spirit should be so disciplined, to have a never ending hunger for the word of God and daily relationship building with Him. Am I desperate? Am I longing?

Yes. I think the older I get and the more challenges I face bring me closer to the feet and heart of God. Last year may be a testament of that. How beautiful it is to see the green grass before me. How amazing it is to know that the path ahead is planned & I have no worries. My life is but a vapor on the wind & soon I will be carried away. 

The challenge is to live life everyday in surrender, to hunger throughout my days for more of Him and less of me. 

For Lord I am hungry and thirsty for more of You and the marvelous things ahead.